Old pranks

Things we should do as old ladies;

1. Harrass the nurses in the nursing home(obviously).

2. Pretend to be deaf all the time

3. Eat chocolate and fart without caring

4. Do random things like dress up in leather and crash young people's rock concerts

5. Randomly talk about all the hot sex we've had so see the shocked look on our grandkid's faces

6. Tell people you are a famous celebrity and don't want the paparazzi to find you, that's why you're hiding in the bushes

7. Sleep all day, then be awake all night and play pranks on the young whippersnappers that live next door

8. Crochet skulls into doilies and decorate your house in goth style

Sayings

Favorite quotes:

1. I'm gonna burn you with this curling iron

2. I wanna do things with my life! I wanna climb mountains! I wanna travel! I want to...plant...orange trees....

3. I'm a finger kind of girl.

4. I see you managed to get your shirt off.

5. Why a spoon cousin? Why not an axe or a sword?

6. Let's go, Snake. I think I hear one of those silent alarms.

7. Did you dry these in a rain forest?

8. There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness.

9. Women only call each other sisters after they call each other a lot of other things first.

10. When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live til I were married.

11. Forbid me? You can't forbid me! I'm not 27 anymore!

12. Dude! We totally started an urban legend!

13. What is this? A school for ants?

14. It's curtains for you! Lacy, gently wafting curtains.

15. Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you're a wanker.

16. Forgive me, fashion, for I have sinned.

17. Glitter is the herpes of the craft world.

18. I rate men from zero to Dean.

19. This is scrumptious!

20. Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!

21. We're having hot lesbian sex, and by lesbian sex, we mean cookies, but it's still hot.

22. You sicken me. I am sickened.

23. Many have said the universe is larger than the Indian ocean.

24. I'm turned on by my own boobs.

25. If it's not Baroque, don't fix it.

Bucket List

Bucket List:

1. Lose virginity (who doesn't have that on their list?)

2. Go to Athens, Greece

3. Sit out under the stars while snuggling with my honey (whomever that may be)

4. Get Master's Degree in Art

5. Own a house with a wraparound porch and porchswing

6. Attend a concert, including Skillet, Within Temptation, Nightwish, and Shiny Toy Guns

7. Find soul mate (yeah, this might be impossible. I don't know)

8. Watch a porn (yeah, I'm weird. I just want to see what they're like)

9. Get an artwork of mine to be hung in a museum

10. Be friends with someone for life

11. Receive flowers from a guy that isn't my family member

12. Go on a real date with a guy that actually like ME

13. Skinny dip

Anything else you think I should do? I encourage you to make a bucket list of your own. It's good to know what your dreams are so you can try to fulfill them, I think.

Insulting

You know what I hate more than anything? When people take a look at my art, telling me how amazing it is and how they'd just die to own it, but when they hear the price, they tell me it's too expensive. I could see if they said they couldn't afford it, but telling me I should lower the price is just plain insulting. I put my heart and soul into my art. How can anyone say that I should make my soul cheaper? Shouldn't I deteremine what I think my time and heart and soul is worth? Why will people spend an exobinate amount of money to buy clothing to wear once a year to the Renissance fair, but not a painting they will see every day for the rest of their lives?

Random Quote:
Ste: "Do not want!"